Friday, January 10, 2014

Parents, talk to your children about what the world won't teach them

The cover of the book Love for Dummies. In case you need more than a flier...

The cover of the book Love for Dummies. In case you need more than a flier...  Photo/FILE
By Abigail Arunga
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A woman should have a choice about what to do with her body, and whether she wants to have a baby or not.

It is ridiculous to me that in 2014, a woman can not only not make that decision, but also needs to get a consent form signed by a male member of her family if she wants to have a hysterectomy or tubal ligation done.

True story. As if a uterus is communal property.
I can already smell the flak coming from the comments section.

PRO-INFORMATION
It would be nice if we made an effort to ensure that that choice to keep the baby or not did not have to happen in the first place.

Maybe if girls had more information, or schooling, or greater exposure to civic awareness concerning sex and their sexual rights, making the choice about whether to keep a baby or not would not be an issue.

Maybe if our police took rape seriously, as an actual crime, instead of the imbecilic usual ‘she asked for it’ or ‘what were you wearing’ or ‘of course you were in a bar’, then this problem would be greatly lessened.

The statistics on how many women die from botched abortions should be enough to make termination of a pregnancy legal.
But it’s not. Which is fine. Kenya is not there yet. I accept that.

PARENTING PROBLEMS
This brings me to another issue. Because of a lack of information, (among other factors), the number of teen pregnancies continues to rise.
In the paper, a teenage girl is in court  accused of faking her kidnapping and running away from home for a year.


The case continues.
Reason? It appears she was pregnant.
I’m sure we all agree, African parents are pretty scary. Most people can recall with clarity vigorous beatings  that forced good manners into them at an early age. All indiscretions were met the same way for the majority: with pain.

Now, the court has yet to to rule on this matter. I don’t know whether her actions were right – I don’t know her, and I don’t know her parents.
But I do know that there is a definite problem with parents and children, and a complete lack of communication.

TALK TO YOUR CHILDREN
We were all children once. We all made mistakes and had to learn from them. No one started out knowing everything.

It is imperative to remember that children are, at the end of the day, children. They need guidance, a little discipline, and a lot of love.

If your child is too scared to come to you with a problem they have, be it school, or even work, be it mistakes they will make along the way or successes – then you have a problem.
An environment in which exchanges are encouraged is vital for the proper psychological growth of a child.

Talk to your children about what the world will not teach them.
Form a relationship with your daughter before you find her body bleeding to death after a botched attempt at ‘redemption’.
Twitter: @AbigailArunga

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