Learn to take better care of your inner being and you will be rewarded with a healthy self-esteem. PHOTO | FOTOSEARCH
By DR MUKUHI NG’ANG’A
In Summary
- Where possible, take an hour or two each week to do something you love. Support your spouse/partner to do the same. It will greatly improve the quality of your life.
Each new year, we make resolutions on how to change
ourselves for the better. Most of these resolutions are targeted towards
improving our physical appearance and work performance. This year, let
us explore the changes required to power a healthy mind.
We are our number one critics. We harshly put
ourselves down for every mistake we make. We often forget our
accomplishments and focus solely on our failures. This is a recipe for
self-destruction. In order to get out of this dark place, learn to treat
yourself with respect and think positively about yourself. Take time
each day to compliment yourself (it can be on small things like your
appearance or on the ‘little successes’ you have had during the day).
This daily affirmation goes a long way in building self-esteem.
Avoid getting burnout
Burnout can happen easily – both in the home and in
the workplace. Most people who get burnout report that they have taken
on more work than they can handle. In other words, they have failed to
look out for themselves. Most of us don’t know how to simply say ‘no’
when faced with a task we know we will struggle to handle.
If your boss asks you to take on a new task, yet
you are overwhelmed by your current workload, speak up and let them
know. Otherwise you will be labelled as an ‘ineffective worker’ when you
fail to reach your targets. If you are invited to an event but it
infringes on time you had planned to spend resting, politely decline.
You do not have to please everyone.
Prioritise your well-being. Learn to say ‘no’.
Learn to look out for yourself. You are not being selfish by doing so;
you are simply taking care of your own interests.
Take time off social media
Over the past 10 years, social media has become the
way people keep up with the lives of those they know. People have been
known to spend several hours on social media sites. Most people share
the highlights of their life with others on social media – which means
you are often bombarded with pictures of people on vacation, new cars,
new homes, new babies, new engagements (and big rings) and new jobs,
among others. Research has shown that people can feel depressed from
scrolling through social media.
This is due to the sub-conscious comparison of
one’s life with the seemingly more exciting/successful lives of their
friends. To avoid this unnecessary mental anguish, take time off social
media and focus on other aspects of your life.
Make sleep a priority
Most of us were brought up to believe that we
should make do with minimal amounts of sleep daily. Sleep is considered
more an interruption of daily activity as opposed to a necessity.
Unfortunately, this view point is not valid. Quality sleep is necessary
for both physical and mental well-being. It is easier to control your
emotions and make good decisions if you are well rested.
Change your scenery
If you find yourself stuck in a rut, change your
physical environment. Take a long drive (or walk), go to a favourite
quiet spot or travel to a different part of the country/world. (Kenya
has lots of beautiful places so finding somewhere to go should not be a
problem).
This time away from your normal routine helps boost
one’s mental well-being. It helps you think about your problems
constructively and releases built-up tension
Eat a healthy diet
How we relate to food is often related to our mental and
physical well-being. When people are stressed, their feeding habits tend
to change – either they eat too much or too little. The choice of food
also changes and often unhealthy food options are chosen. The physical
changes that come with the change in food choices (weight gain or loss)
often act as a reminder of our problem. This usually makes the situation
worse.
As part of maintaining a healthy mind this year,
try and stick to a healthy diet – regardless of whether you feel like it
or not. Eat lots of vegetables and fruits and keep your body well
hydrated (remember, alcohol may be liquid but it does not contribute to
your daily fluid intake. This is because it has the ability to
potentially dehydrate you).
Lean on others for support
Most of us thrive to be independent. We want to do
everything by ourselves. We want to ‘make it on our own’. We feel that
that is the hallmark of success. Unfortunately, this attitude makes it
difficult for us to share our problems with others. We want to ‘fix
everything’ on our own and when we can’t, we feel like failures. It is
important to get yourself a support structure.
This includes family, friends and trusted
colleagues/mentors. These are people you can count on to offer a
different perspective on how to deal with your problems and help find
effective solutions to them.
Spend time with family
The most common regret amongst older professionals
is that they didn’t spend enough time with their children when they were
growing up. Few people look back 20 years and regret a business deal
they didn’t manage to negotiate. Spend time each day with your family.
Call those who you cannot physically meet. Get to be an active part of
their life. Connecting with those we care about has been shown to
significantly improve mental well-being.
Embrace physical fitness
People who exercise regularly often report that
they get a certain ‘high’ after each session. Something also experienced
during other physical activities like dancing and even sex. This is due
to release of ‘feel good’ chemicals in the brain. So, this year as part
of improving your mental wellbeing, incorporate more physical activity
into your life.
Take care of known medical conditions
Poorly controlled medical conditions (like
diabetes, gout and high blood pressure) cause significant financial and
emotional strain. This year, make it a priority to optimise treatment
for any medical condition you have. Make the necessary nutritional and
lifestyle changes required to make your life better. In the long run,
you will be much happier for doing so.
Learn to say ‘thank you’
‘He/she doesn’t appreciate anything I do!’ This is
one of the most common complaints by spouses and employees (about their
bosses). Gratitude goes a long way in improving one’s mental wellbeing.
If you take time to appreciate what those around you do to make your
life easier, you will be amazed at how your perspective on life will
change (for the better).
Daily ‘me time’
The hustle and bustle of being a parent, working full
time and spending long hours commuting to and from work can take a toll
on anyone.
Learn to take time each day to relax and enjoy yourself. It
can just be a 20-minute walk each lunchtime to clear your head or read
your favourite book. During this time, allow yourself to relax.
Where possible, take an hour or two each week to do
something you love. Support your spouse/partner to do the same. It will
greatly improve the quality of your life.
Remember, you cannot change yesterday. You cannot
predict tomorrow. You, however, have control over the here and now.
Enjoy the moment. Happy 2016.
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