11 parenting rules you should break

 

Breast milk is the basic food for every baby. Besides being easily digestible, it boosts their immune system, therefore enhancing wellbeing and development. Photo/FILE 

Mother and child playing a video game. Wouldn’t it be nice if all you had to do was follow a set of rules, and you would automatically produce nice, loving, productive members of society? Photo/FILE 

In Summary

• Sure, there are “rules” that are just understood, or passed down from generation to generation as to what “good parents” are supposed to do.
• But even those aren’t right in every situation, and as the saying goes, “rules are meant to be broken.”
• Here are 11 parenting rules every mom should break at some point.

 

By Julie Ryan Evans
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When it comes to parenting, many of us often lament how we wish the job came with a rule book.

Wouldn’t it be nice if all you had to do was follow a set of rules, and you would automatically produce nice, loving, productive members of society?

Unfortunately, the gig is not quite that simple. Sure, there are “rules” that are just understood, or passed down from generation to generation as to what “good parents” are supposed to do.

But even those aren’t right in every situation, and as the saying goes, “rules are meant to be broken.” Here are 10 parenting rules every mom should break at some point.

1. ALWAYS SET A GOOD EXAMPLE

It’s okay for you to make mistakes, and it’s, in fact, helpful for children to see that you do. They learn it’s okay not to be perfect.

2. CHILDREN NEED THEIR SLEEP

Sleep is important, but some random late night snacks or midnight dances in the moonlight on occasion will forever be memorable.

3. MORE THAN 30 MINUTES OF TELEVISION A DAY WILL ROT THEIR BRAINS

Not every day, but sometimes on a cold, rainy day, there is nothing wrong with snuggling up on the couch and vegging for hours in front of the TV.

4. YOUR CHILDREN’S NEEDS SHOULD ALWAYS COME FIRST

A hard one for most moms, but it’s really okay once in a while that you don’t want to play Dora the Explorer, for the bazillionth time because you just need to relax and collect your thoughts for a few minutes.

5. SCHOOL ATTENDANCE IS A MUST

Again, not regularly, but every once in a while, keeping them home or signing them out early to spend a carefree day with you can be just what you both need in the midst of a busy year.

6. DO NOT GIVE THEM JUNK FOOD

If most of their diet is healthy, every once in a while, a big ice cream splurge or fast food meal is not going to kill them.

It can also help them from feeling so deprived and binging on all of the bad stuff when they’re able.

7. DO NOT LET THEM TALK BACK TO YOU

They need to learn to do so in a polite way, but they should not just have to accept what you say at face value.

You want them to challenge and think for themselves, and if you are always throwing “because I said so!” at them, that is not nurturing those skills.

8. POTTY MOUTHS ARE NOT ALLOWED

If you have open and honest discussions with them about such “bad” words, they will become less alluring.

Let them know there is a time and a place for such words, and if they want to go scream them in the bedroom, then they can (as long as grandma isn’t visiting).

9. DO NOT COMPARE THEM TO OTHER CHILDREN

Not in a bragging, obnoxious way, or to make them feel inferior to their friends, but I find it incredibly helpful to talk to other moms with children the same ages as mine and discuss various developmental and emotional issues they are going through.

It helps me know where my children are in relation to others and sometimes gives me ideas on what we need to work on.

10. ALWAYS BE THEIR BIGGEST CHEERLEADER

They are not always going to be right, plain and simple, and to take your children’s side just because it’s your child does not teach them anything.

Telling them when they are wrong and when you are disappointed with them is okay. Also, everything they do does not have to be the most amazing, special thing ever.

11. DO NOT LET THEM FIGHT

You may feel like it is your job to referee, but it is best to butt out when children bicker over a game or tussle over a toy.

“It’s important for your kids to learn to work out their own difficulties,” says Susan Newman, author of Little Things Long Remembered: Making Your Children Feel Special Every Day. Unless someone is going to get hurt, step back and let your child figure out how to negotiate with his or her peers.”

"These are crucial social skills kids need to develop to learn how to work well with others, when to stand up for themselves and when to back down,” explains Newman.

This article first appeared in the Daily Monitor