Values that keep the family strong

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Sunday, 28 October 2012 12:12

By Sound Living Reporter We live in times when parents think that spoiling children with material needs is enough to make them go through life and its challenges. Today’s dot.com parents ignore values based on love, morals and harmony. These values have been replaced by material joys. However, once these provisions run out, the spoiled child will find him/herself unable to move on in life. As a result of this, the same parents, when older and if in need of care by their children, should not expect much. How can children who have been given everything without much effort, by parents who want a guilt free conscience, be capable of giving back? Are they to be blamed for leaving the elderly lonely in pension homes? As your children grow older, you don’t want them thinking family values are automatic, because they’re not. You as the parent should start teaching your children the value of family as soon as possible. Start teaching your child from day one as soon as they are old enough to understand about the principles and values that are part of a family. James and Melody Masaka’s family comes off as an epitome of family unity and love. Each member of the family feels accountable to the other for their actions. The star of love shines right from the four siblings down to their parents and the neighbours. But this did not happen overnight. Over the years, the family has successfully kept quarrels with neighbours at bay. Petty issues are resolved amicably hence domestic violence is a vice they only read about in the newspapers. The well-kept secret lies beyond being prayerful. The parents have successfully implanted Christian values in the children’s thought process. The boys-only family has been groomed to cherish good, even in the absence of the overzealous parental eye. It has become natural for them to act “straight and clean”. Building such a firm moral foundation costs more sacrifice than just acting religious. “From the onset of our marriage, we accepted Jesus as our personal saviour. We sacrificed earthly pleasures other families enjoyed such as going out late in the night for album launches,” the graduate primary school teacher reveals. As the clock ticked away, God blessed them, with children and they entrenched the Christian virtues with even more devotion. “We had to make a lasting first impression right from the first born,” Melody, the 46-year-old mother chips in. She is particularly proud that her husband remained a Christian for the sake of raising upright children. “We began to host church fellowships, reached out to the needy neighbours and became more exemplary,” she says. In essence, they were shooting two birds with one stone. The father beams as he confidently shares: “We did not allow them to watch secular music or movies, the first two grew up cherishing Godly stuff and therefore passed on the values to the siblings. It is on this note that he advises other parents to make a parenting mark on the first born child as she or he becomes the point of reference for the siblings. Once they won him to a Christian life, they celebrated victory already registered as regards the rest of the children. However, in order to consolidate these gains, the parents had to keep in touch with the boys. “At puberty, those virtues can easily be eroded if they are not safeguarded from negative peer pressure and the world’s secularity,” the 52- year-old says. Interestingly, keeping close to them did not mean putting them on house arrest. “We let them interact, play and mingle with their peers after all; the family principles had already taken root in their lives,” James says. All in all, it comes back to consistency and resilience.